Barton's Manuscript on Retirement

I'm writing a humorous account of retirement, entitled, "Retirement is for Sissies." Written chapters include: no more work and no more jerks, hey retiree, you talkin' to me, take your viagra and shove it, retire from what, don't quit and sit, work is a four-letter word, maturity is not mediocrity, leap before you creep. Ten more chapters to follow as time permits.